Source: http://www.soccerblog.com/2012/04/pep-guardiolas-press-conferenc-1.htm
Monday, April 30, 2012
Overlooking the Return of Pass and Move Football
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/team-news/the-overlooked-return-of-pass-and-move-football.html
Nike South Korea Home Jersey Review ? 2012
Source: http://soccerprose.com/soccer-fans/nike-south-korea-home-jersey-review-2012/
Nike Mercurial Blade Shin Guard Review
Source: http://soccerprose.com/soccer-players/nike-mercurial-blade-shinguard-review/
CHIVAS: Another Philly fine, suspension
Source: http://espn.go.com/blog/los-angeles/soccer/post/_/id/16098/chivas-another-philly-fine-suspension
Adam Absence Confirmed, and Other Thursday Notes
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/team-news/adam-absence-confirmed-and-other-thursday-notes.html
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Requiem for an American Soccer Club
Source: http://www.davesfootballblog.com/post/2011/01/28/requiem-for-an-american-soccer-club/
Overlooking the Return of Pass and Move Football
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/team-news/the-overlooked-return-of-pass-and-move-football.html
Euro 2012 Symbol Defacement Wins Public Shaming
A couple of local gents in Dnepropetrovsk had a bit too much of the lager and when jaunting about town, decided to kick one of the giant display balls, which then smashed into pieces. Not having the [...]
Source: http://www.worldcupblog.org/world-football/euro-2012-symbol-defacement-wins-public-shaming.html
Stephen Burbank Cancels 2011-12 NFL Season
Source: http://www.davesfootballblog.com/post/2011/02/02/stephen-burbank-cancels-2011-12-nfl-season/
Rebuilding FIFA Street
Source: http://fifasoccerblog.com/blog/rebuilding-fifa-street/
Referee injures his shoulder while signaling for a free kick during Napoli match
[Forbes: David Beckham leads highest-paid footballers | Most-valuable football clubs]
Less than a minute into Napoli's match against Novara, the referee got a little too excited when signaling for a free kick and injured his shoulder.
Bizarrely, play was halted after only 45 seconds when referee Daniele Doveri required treatment for a shoulder injury. He even had to lie down on the bench at the touchline to receive physiotherapy for around 10 minutes. He appeared to pick up the injury when signaling for a free kick and threw his right shoulder a little too vehemently. Doveri tore a muscle in his shoulder and went into the locker rooms to receive strapping and a pain-killing injection, which seemed to do the trick.
After an 18-minute delay, the match resumed with Doveri back in charge and, just for his own personal safety, he didn't call a foul for the rest of the match. OK, that's not true at all, but Napoli did go on to win 2-0 and Doveri proved that he likes to finish what he starts.
There hasn't been quality video of the incident as of yet, but here's the best available for those who are curious...
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Wednesday Preview: Fire Host TFC | WVHooligan - Soccer Blog [Digg]
Saturday, April 28, 2012
The key to Andy Carroll?s recent success is Jordan Henderson?s hair gel
It's no secret that Andy Carroll's 42 performances in a Liverpool shirt this season have been largely forgettable, but his presence has been critical to success in the last two outings: he headed in a late winner in the 3-2 win over Blackburn, and his skull was also responsible for the goal that put the Anfield side through to the FA Cup Final.
So why has Carroll's cranium suddenly become so effective? Apparently it has nothing to do with discovering the form that Liverpool paid �35m to see week-in-week-out, and everything to do with borrowing his colleague's grooming products. According to Martin Kelly on Twitter, the "big AC" has borrowed teammate Jordan Henderson's hair gel in the past two games, resulting in a tamed mane and two headed goals.
If the application of hair gel directly correlates to goal scoring, that explains an awful lot about Cristiano Ronaldo's career success.
Saudi League Licensed For FIFA 13?
Source: http://fifasoccerblog.com/blog/saudi-league-licensed-for-fifa-13/
Mario Menezes Renders World Cup 2014 Moot, Claims Victory
English Premier League Weekend Preview ? 28 April 2012
Share and Enjoy
• Facebook • Twitter • Delicious • Digg • StumbleUpon • Add to favorites • Email • RSSSource: http://www.the90thminute.com/soccer/2012/04/english-premier-league-weekend-preview-28-april-2012/
El Clasico Liveblog
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BarcelonaFootballBlog/~3/6SHSydAm6Dg/
Friday, April 27, 2012
Premier League Betting Preview: Stoke v Arsenal, Norwich v Liverpool, Chelsea v QPR and Tottenham v Blackburn
Premier League Betting Preview: Stoke v Arsenal, Norwich v Liverpool, Chelsea v QPR and Tottenham v Blackburn - originally posted on Soccerlens.com
The last weekend of April could see the Premier League title decided one way or the other. But before Monday night, there’s quite a lot of football still to play with Arsenal fighting to secure third place, Chelsea and Tottenham fighting to make up ground to fourth place and Liverpool fighting to stay ahead of...
From Soccerlens.com - Football News
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/soccerlens/~3/3tSjMH2OBeU/
Liverpool allowing Fox to film documentary series to boost revenue
Liverpool will be allowing unprecedented behind-the-scenes access to U.S.-based Fox Soccer Channel to film a six-part documentary series. "Our Liverpool: Never Walk Alone" will document the club's FA Cup final against Chelsea in May, as well as their preseason tour of North America in July. The finished product will air in the fall in the U.S., but it is being billed as a "global television event."
Fox Soccer is owned by Rupert Murdoch's News Corp. -- the same parent company that publishes The Sun, which has been actively boycotted by people in Liverpool and fans of the club since the tabloid reported vicious accusations against Liverpool supporters involved in the Hillsborough disaster in 1989.
The decision to do the series was the idea of the club's newest American owners, who hope it will help boost Liverpool's already considerable popularity abroad, which will then increase revenue they can spend on bringing in high-priced talents like Andy Carroll, Stewart Downing and Jordan Henderson. From the AP:
''I come from a background where the more supporters get to know the inside workings of the club the more they are interested in the club itself,'' said Liverpool chairman Tom Werner, also chairman of the Boston Red Sox. ''I am not fearful of showing some behind the scenes look at what's going on because it will only increase awareness of the players.'' [...]
''I think we are interested in raising revenues so that we can be as competitive as possible with Manchester United and Arsenal and Chelsea with the other clubs,'' Werner said. ''And I see this as a mechanism to increase the club's popularity.''
But to increase the club's popularity, viewers will first have to understand what they're saying. And for at least one member of the staff, that might require a bit of assistance.
With his thick Scottish accent, Liverpool manager Kenny Dalglish could be hard for some viewers to understand.
''We probably will have to do a tad of captioning for Kenny,'' [Fox Sports chairman David] Hill said.
Jokes aside, that really doesn't seem necessary. Glaring at people who ask him questions should be universally understood.
The series seems like a great move for Liverpool (assuming it doesn't prove to be about the downfall of King Kenny's troubled reign) and will hopefully show other clubs that giving fans some insight into their inner workings can improve supporter relations and make them seem less monolithic. Although, Hill doesn't seem to think Liverpool's rivals at Manchester United will follow their lead anytime soon. When asked if what the odds of Sir Alex Ferguson agreeing to something like this, he put them at "100-1 against." So he's saying there's a chance...
Napoli?s Morgan De Sanctis apologizes to ball boy with a kiss and a shirt
During the first half of Napoli's 2-0 win at Lecce, goalkeeper Morgan De Sanctis yelled at a ball boy for throwing the ball back into play too quickly for his delicate taste. At halftime, De Sanctis realized that he went overboard in his reaction to the kid and tried to make it up to him by giving him a kiss and the shirt off his back.
Unlike the Chievo ball boy who refused Sulley Muntari's shirt a couple weeks ago because of club policy, the Lecce ball boy accepted it just as his larger coworker reached out for De Sanctis as he walked away. So one ball boy received a nice gesture and the other an awkward missed connection.
Video via 101gg
In a shootout with five misses, Sergio Ramos? was the most emphatic
Bayern Munich will play a Champions League final at home against Chelsea after missing fewer penalties than Real Madrid in a shootout that would probably be best described as "nerve-teasingly fun." Unless you're Real Madrid.
With two early goals from Cristiano Ronaldo (including a penalty), Real Madrid beat Bayern 2-1 in regular time of their semifinal second leg to put the aggregate score at 3-3 and away goals even at one for each side. So they went to extra time and, after nothing came of that, the dreaded penalty shootout.
[Related: Jose Mourinho's 'very noble' gesture after�Real Madrid's loss]
Bayern's 19-year-old midfielder David Alaba was the first up and he proved far more clinical than many of the older stars that followed him. Cristiano Ronaldo had his low shot towards the corner saved by Manuel Neuer, then Mario Gomez made his to put Bayern two up. Kaka was next and his shot was almost identical to Ronaldo's, which Neuer again blocked. Then it was Iker Casillas' turn to play the gloved hero, saving Toni Kroos' shot and Philipp Lahm's after Xabi Alonso gave Madrid their only make.
So with Madrid down just 2-1 thanks to Casillas, it was Sergio "The Trophy Killer" Ramos' turn and he blasted a cannon shot over the crossbar. He Charlie Adam'd it to a supreme degree. That left Bastian Schweinsteiger to seal the win for Bayern, which he did. And Mario Gomez rejoiced...
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Match Preview: Liverpool v. West Brom, 04.22.12
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/team-news/match-preview-liverpool-v-west-brom-04-22-12.html
Phil Scolari says people don?t like Cristiano Ronaldo because of his success with women
Last year, Cristiano Ronaldo said that fans of rival teams jeer and envy him because "I am handsome, rich and a great player." But now someone other than Cristiano Ronaldo is echoing that statement.
According to former Chelsea and Portugal manager Phil Scolari all that is true, along with one other key reason he has so many critics: the amount of intercourse he has.
Said Scolari -- the man Ronaldo credits with helping him decide to leave Manchester United for Real Madrid -- in an interview with SporTV Arena (via SambaFoot):
''Some people do not like him because he is a great player, good-looking and has sex with all the ladies. People get jealous."
Well, I'm sure there's one or two he hasn't had sex with yet, but we get the point, Phil.
Despite that slight exaggeration, even Scolari admits that there is one little (Argentine) reason why Ronaldo's life isn't totally perfect. Even though he's sexing the world's entire female population.
''The only bad thing about Cristiano's life is Messi. If it wasn't for Messi, Cristiano would be the best player in the world for five consecutive years."
Given that, I'd say that if Leo Messi ever turns up missing, you'd know who was responsible. But it sounds like Ronaldo is far to busy with...other things.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
Donetsk Turns Bus Stops Into Goals
It’s going to be a terrible idea the first time an old lady gets her nose broken because some kid decided to chip a Moskvitch [...]
Source: http://www.worldcupblog.org/world-football/donetsk-turns-bus-stops-into-goals.html
2012 MLS, Week 8: What To Watch For
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/WVHooligan/~3/BS188GlgvWQ/
Let?s Play: Barcelona ? Chelsea
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BarcelonaFootballBlog/~3/MOkiKrUeNaM/
Rafa Marquez runs opponent into the ground and breaks his clavicle
Just before halftime in the New York Red Bulls' 2-2 draw against San Jose on Saturday night, New York's Rafa Marquez made his time in MLS even more disappointing than it already was. While defending a corner kick, Marquez decided to wrap his arms around San Jose's Shea Salinas and run him into the ground shoulder first. He even added an extra kick to the face just for good measure.
It was a bizarre move which was way over the top even if there was some kind of provocation, but Marquez got away with it and didn't receive a yellow card until the 86th minute.
Salinas, meanwhile, had to leave the match with a fractured clavicle.
Between this and telling the press that his teammates weren't equal to him last season, it's really starting to seem like the Mexico captain is only in MLS as some kind of saboteur. And to collect the league's third highest wages ($4.6 million in 2011). Actually, it's probably just the latter.
Colombian footballer allegedly threatens teammates with paintball gun
Argentina Primera Division side Racing Club kicked striker Teofilo Gutierrez off the squad after he allegedly threatened his teammates with a paintball gun. Gutierrez was sent off in the 67th minute of Saturday's 4-1 loss to Independiente (he also scored Racing Club's only goal), leaving his side to play with nine men when they were still just 2-1 down.
It was the Colombian international's fourth sending off since he joined the club from Tranbzonspor in February of last year. And though he's scored 22 goals in 35 matches with the club, his teammates got fed up with him and that's when the trouble began.
From Reuters:
Local media reported fighting in the Racing changing room at Independiente as team mates turned on Gutierrez after a senseless red card for insulting the referee left them with nine men for the final 21 minutes on Saturday. The striker then allegedly threatened them with a paintball gun.
"We will seek a mutual way out but (Gutierrez) won't play for Racing again," Cogorno said of the 26-year-old [...]
"People are tired of Teo's attitude," he added of the striker.
Though Liverpool was reportedly very interested in Gutierrez last year, this paintball gun business makes it sound like he might flourish at Chelsea. Just put him and Ashley Cole in a room together and they can shoot each other all day.
Future News: Barcelona petition FIFA to declare possession more important than goals
Barcelona took a bold step to ensure their continued dominance by petitioning FIFA to rewrite the rules of football so that possession of the ball counts for more than goals scored. Following two important losses over a four day span to Chelsea and Real Madrid in which Barcelona dominated�possession�of the ball but still failed to score more goals than their opposition, they decided that now was the time to act.
"Football is obviously broken," said Barcelona midfielder, and defender of all that is right, Xavi. "When the team that just scores the most goals is ruled the winner over a team that holds the ball for the vast majority of the match only because the rules say so,�something is very wrong. And it is time we correct that wrong. Because Cesc is suffering."
Xavi is not the only Barcelona player speaking out on this issue, though. After Barcelona's 1-0 loss to Chelsea in the first leg of their Champions League semifinal despite maintaing 79 percent of possession, Andres Iniesta labeled the match "unjust." A sentiment that teammate Sergio Busquests echoed after Barcelona lost a decisive match in the Spanish league title race to rivals Real Madrid by a score of 2-1 even though the Catalans kept 72 percent of possession.
"We hope that FIFA will finally take this matter seriously and take action," Xavi continued, standing on a table so he could be seen. "It is time for all other clubs to resume their poor�imitation of�our style of play and lose to us with dignity. After all, everyone knows that playing disciplined defense within the rules of the game and then using patience and precision to score on the counter attack is still cheating and equivalent to puppy murder. Actually, it's worse. Defending is worse than puppy murder."
When reached for comment on Barcelona's petition, a FIFA spokesman said they are taking these concerns quite seriously and the public should be far more interested in this than anything to do with corruption.
Making Over the US Open Cup | WVHooligan - Soccer Blog [Digg]
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Chelsea advances to UEFA Champions League Final with 2-2 draw the Nou Camp
Share and Enjoy
• Facebook • Twitter • Delicious • Digg • StumbleUpon • Add to favorites • Email • RSSFSB Interview ? Euro 2012 Producer Seb Enrique
Source: http://fifasoccerblog.com/blog/fsb-interview-euro-2012-line-producer-seb-enrique/
Roma?s Erik Lamela gets three-match ban for spitting at Stephan Lichtsteiner
Near the end of Juventus' 4-0 win over a 10-man Roma side, Stephan Lichtsteiner and Erik Lamela got into a bit of a tiff. As the two jawed at each other, Lichtsteiner attempted to shut Lamela down by simply showing him one finger for each goal Juve scored (pictured below). Unable to form a witty, finger-based comeback, Lamela decided to spit at Lichtsteiner as he jogged by.
Well, Lamela's loogie was caught on camera and on Monday he was hit with a three-match ban for it. In a statement on its official website, Roma says that they reviewed the video and will not appeal. It was also added that, "Erik Lamela wishes to apologize to the fans, his teammates, the coach and his opponent for this regrettable incident."
Meanwhile, Lichtsteiner's original�proclamation�still stands...
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Nike Releases Euro 2012 Kits
Rarely, if ever, do promotional shots seem to indicate the actual height of footballer, making them appear giants when in reality, many could appear to be trick-or-treaters with a half decent mask. This one seems more appropriate. Though Wesley Sneijder does look as if he’s about to [...]
Source: http://www.worldcupblog.org/euro-2012/nike-releases-euro-2012-kits.html
The Club That Cried Luck
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/premier-league/the-club-that-cried-luck.html
Valencia giving away Europa League semifinal tickets for free
The Europa League has been very entertaining at times this season, but it is still an overpriced consolation tournament. And so Valencia have decided to give season ticket holders free entry to the second leg of their Europa League semifinal against Atletico Madrid in an effort to ensure they have a full stadium as they trail 4-2 (thanks in part to the lovely Falcao goal above) after the first leg.
From Reuters:
"It is an absolute necessity that there is an extraordinary atmosphere at the Mestalla that helps push the side towards the achievable aim of a place in the final in Bucharest," the 2004 UEFA Cup winners said in a statement on Friday.
Valencia fans, who will be reimbursed if they have already purchased a ticket, have whistled their team and under-fire coach Unai Emery after some inconsistent results in recent weeks.
Yes, when clubs are giving away free tickets (and reimbursing those who already bought them) to the second leg of a semifinal when they're only down by two goals, it might be a sign that the competition needs revamping. Again.
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
The Future?s Not Ours To See
Source: http://www.davesfootballblog.com/post/2011/04/27/the-futures-not-ours-to-see/
Geoff Shreeves tries to make Branislav Ivanovic cry in post-match interview
Branislav Ivanovic went into the Champions League final second leg with Barcelona knowing a booking would keep him out of the final if Chelsea progressed. Following his penalty protests, he saw yellow, which means he'll be joining John Terry, Raul Mereiles and Ramires on the sidelines in Munich on May 19th.
Sky Sports reporter Geoff Shreeves seemed very keen to remind the Serbian defender of his unfortunate predicament in a post-match interview. If you pause the video at around the five-second mark, you'll just about capture the moment when Shreeves�metaphorically�punches him in the junk.
10 of the best Dutch footballers in recent years
10 of the best Dutch footballers in recent years - originally posted on Soccerlens.com
The Netherlands international team go into this summer’s Euro 2012 tournament as one of the favourites and frontrunners, with quality throughout Bert van Marwijk’s side. However, unfortunately the Eredivisie has lost its ability to keep the best homegrown players in the country and Ajax’s UEFA Champions League glory of 1995 seems like an eternity ago....
From Soccerlens.com - Football News
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/soccerlens/~3/i4zE_e3CA3A/
Weekend Betting Odds: Arsenal v Chelsea and Manchester United v Everton
Weekend Betting Odds: Arsenal v Chelsea and Manchester United v Everton - originally posted on Soccerlens.com
Two cracking games on Sky this weekend, and first up is the lunchtime clash between Arsenal and Chelsea on Saturday (12.45pm Ko, SS2). Arsenal v Chelsea The Gunners have been chalked up as even money (2) favourites with�Boylesports�and�Betfred�to come out on top and they are expected to do just that. The Wenger boys have won...
From Soccerlens.com - Football News
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/soccerlens/~3/GwVL244zBDY/
Revealed: The 2012-13 Nike Netherlands Home Jersey
Source: http://soccerprose.com/soccer-fans/revealed-the-2012-13-nike-netherlands-home-jersey/
Mario Menezes Renders World Cup 2014 Moot, Claims Victory
Revealed: The 2012-13 Nike USA Home Jersey?
Source: http://soccerprose.com/national-teams/revealed-the-2012-13-nike-usa-home-jersey/
Monday, April 23, 2012
English Premier League Weekend Recap ? 21 April 2012
Share and Enjoy
• Facebook • Twitter • Delicious • Digg • StumbleUpon • Add to favorites • Email • RSSSource: http://www.the90thminute.com/soccer/2012/04/english-premier-league-weekend-recap-21-april-2012/
UEFA Euro 2012: Trophies
Source: http://fifasoccerblog.com/blog/uefa-euro-2012-trophies/
Well Played Portland, Well Played | WVHooligan - Soccer Blog [Digg]
Peter Crouch probably doesn?t play a lot of golf
It was the England Foundation Charity Golf Day today, which gave Peter Crouch the perfect opportunity to show how ridiculous he looks holding a driver.
The Stoke striker also showed his utter lack of fairway etiquette by teeing up in skinny jeans and boots. Honestly, who plays golf in jeans? Everybody knows you're supposed to wear tasteful slacks like these.
Spotted on kicktv.tumblr.com
Central midfield pairing of Juninho and Kovalenko is key to Los Angeles? title run in | WVHooligan - Soccer Blog [Digg]
Mario Menezes Renders World Cup 2014 Moot, Claims Victory
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Vizari Harmony Soccer Ball ? Size 3
Source: http://www.totalsoccermadness.com/vizari-harmony-soccer-ball-size-3/
Barca 1, Evil Empire 2, aka ?Winning, losing, pride and states of grace?
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BarcelonaFootballBlog/~3/fWgSpwZ0nz0/
Saturday, April 21, 2012
The Existential Dread of the Final
Source: http://www.davesfootballblog.com/post/2011/05/28/the-existential-dread-of-the-final/
Match Preview: Liverpool v. West Brom, 04.22.12
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/team-news/match-preview-liverpool-v-west-brom-04-22-12.html
The goal that spawned 1000 cules
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/BarcelonaFootballBlog/~3/fw6jxr9_e40/
Euro 2012 Symbol Defacement Wins Public Shaming
A couple of local gents in Dnepropetrovsk had a bit too much of the lager and when jaunting about town, decided to kick one of the giant display balls, which then smashed into pieces. Not having the [...]
Source: http://www.worldcupblog.org/world-football/euro-2012-symbol-defacement-wins-public-shaming.html
April 19/20: What to watch, where to go
Source: http://espn.go.com/blog/los-angeles/soccer/post/_/id/15930/april-1920-what-to-watch-where-to-go
Donetsk Turns Bus Stops Into Goals
It’s going to be a terrible idea the first time an old lady gets her nose broken because some kid decided to chip a Moskvitch [...]
Source: http://www.worldcupblog.org/world-football/donetsk-turns-bus-stops-into-goals.html
2012 MLS Power Rankings: Week 6
Source: http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/WVHooligan/~3/4vw607QgdoI/
Suarez Plans Extended Stay, and Other Tuesday Notes
* We’ve got a bit of a run on Luis Suarez today, with the biggest [...]
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/team-news/suarez-plans-extended-stay-and-other-tuesday-notes.html
DT Exclusive: Jose Mourinho investigates who stole Real Madrid?s boots
Prior to the first leg of Bayern Munich and Real Madrid's Champions League semifinal in Munich, a mystery thief stole six pairs of boots from Real's dressing room. Three pairs belonged to Cristiano Ronaldo alone, while the others belonged to Mesut Ozil and Karim Benzema. Real Madrid went on to lose the match 2-1 and Ronaldo failed to score. Meanwhile, Marca says that Bayern have given no explanation for the theft even though the dressing rooms at the Allianz Arena are�monitored�by security cameras (sidebar: what?). The following is a transcript of Real Madrid manager Jose Mourinho's investigation into the matter.
Mourinho: Someone is trying to undermine me and I will find out who it is. Like every evil plot, the most obvious suspect is Barcelona conspirator and fake charity organization UNICEF. Marcelo, get me list of UNICEF celebrity ambassadors/nefarious operatives.
[Marcelo hands him a pirate scroll]
Mourinho: Messi, Shakira -- too obvious. Here is one, this is the thief. (Dials phone) Ricky Martin, you stole boots from Real Madrid. Admit it now or you will be dying la vida loca.
Martin: What? That doesn't even make sense. Mr. Mourinho, like I told you when you accused me of hiding pro-Barcelona messages in the official song of the 1998 World Cup last year -- I have no idea what you're talking about.
Mourinho: You are a lying liar, Ricky Martin. Admit that Xavi was in Menudo! Admit it now!
[Ricky Martin hangs up]
Mourinho: It was not Ricky Martin. But I know which of his cohorts it was. (Dials another number) Jackie Chan, give back Ronaldo's boots or I will show you what MMA really means: Mourinho Martial Arts. Your eyes will�squeal�like a pony horse carrying Rafa Benitez.
Chan:
Mourinho: Jackie Chan is innocent. This time. But if it was not UNICEF it must have been referees. Howard Webb was too busy preparing to be horrible at his job to do it. That leaves Wolfgang Stark. (Dials) Hello? Wolfgang? It is Jose Mourinho. I am surprised you were able to answer your phone without swallowing it. Admit your crime to me right now. Do it. Do it now.
Stark: I am seriously considering a career as a dentist because of you. A dentist! Please, I'm begging you, just leave me alone.
Mourinho: If it wasn't UNICEF and it wasn't referees, it must be Bayern. Still upset after I beat them in 2010 Champions League final to win the treble. Looking to get advantage when they know they cannot win over two legs. So who was it? Franck Ribery's prostitutes? Mario Gomez's ornamental hair? Philipp Lahm looking for a new shoe to live inside? I will know.
Xabi Alonso: Boss? Pepe is hiding in the corner and chewing on the missing boots. Kaka tried to take them away but Pepe stabbed him in the neck. Kaka already forgave him, but then passed out. He's bleeding everywhere. I think he said something about seeing a light and going towards Real Madrid Resort Island.
Mourinho: It was Shakira all along...
Friday, April 20, 2012
Liverpool Set to Face ?Embarrassed? Chelsea
Source: http://liverpool.theoffside.com/fa-cup/liverpool-set-to-face-embarrassed-chelsea.html